“In these times I don’t, in a manner of speaking, know what I want; perhaps I don’t want what I know and want what I don’t know.”
Possible answer to the question of, “What do we need as an intelligent race of beings to free ourselves of this cyclical season of uncertainty, pain and turmoil?”
If you are like most in this distressing hour of existence, you are grappling with your fears of uncertainty with regard to the tumultuous state human kind finds itself in. Wondering endlessly whether or not we will survive the day much less if there will be brighter tomorrows we can harmoniously and peacefully share with one another.
In these times we should not despair if we do not possess all of the answers to fix our most daunting problems but rather find solace in the fact that we know what it is that we don’t want – seething interpersonal hatred towards one another; a lack of truth and integrity within those who hold authority over us; constant struggling as a community of peoples, as well as individuals, for meager survival within a world continuously gravitating towards the “Have’s and Have Nots”.
We know we don’t want the constant pain of losing the minimal peace and self-respect that seems to slip away from us with every untruth told or fabrication constructed to pacify us by those without conscience or sympathy; with each fiendish machination manufactured to divide us from one another; with every device devised to wreak destruction upon our homes, our lands and our world; with each and every senseless death.
It is here where we begin to make sense of it all – coming to terms with the reality of understanding exactly where we are and with knowing what we don’t want and have the courage to embrace an unknown of possibilities of that which we can create a better tomorrow together!
Considering Marsilio Ficino, “The Letters of Marsilio Ficino, Volume 3”
“Three great forces rule the world: stupidity, fear and greed.”
Possible answer to the question of, “What is it we continuously nurture that will one day gain total sovereignty and devour us whole?
It is not difficult to see the true relationship between the question and answer. The three headed dragon is an apocalyptic beast of our own construction.
Stupidity undermines our intellect and corrupts the ability to courageously face a world in which we can all have the opportunity to prosper equally.
Fear in excess prevents the understanding and appreciation of that which differs from our skewed viewpoint of an existence we mistakenly believe was meant solely for our own personal measure.
..and Greed, of course, is the insatiable desire to consume or possess more than what is necessary generating an imbalance of Creation. We voraciously seek selfish gratification regardless of its destructive nature.
Together this three headed monster will methodically destroy all things in its wake. On the eve of this destruction, there can be no weeping or regret for we have ignorantly given birth to the instrument of our own demise.
Unfortunately, it is easier to split the atom than it is tearing apart the heads of these destructive forces from one another.
(Considering Albert Einstein – geboren 14 March 1879, gestorben 18 April 1955)
Most see things as they are and ask, “Why?” A select few dream of what could be and ask, “Why not?”
Possible answer to the question of, “Why can’t things change from the way they are now?”
Generally, most remain passive when confronted with possibilities of what “could be” in this world and perhaps beyond. Regardless of what inspired the thought or idea be it a personal self-improvement; some social injustice or an act of nature, the general masses will allow their inspiration to be a fleeting moment never to enter their consciousness again.
Then there are the select few who will take that divine revelation and engineer it beyond mere thought into concrete reality evolving themselves personally and possibly transforming the world and history itself manifest the dream or nightmare depending on ones perspective.
The point is we can’t always relegate ourselves to being “just passengers” along for the journey. We must be brave enough to get behind the wheel and determine which direction we, sometimes the world and beyond, will take.
(Considering George Benard Shaw – Back to Methuselah (1949), You see things; and you say “Why?” But I dream things that never were; and I say “Why not?”)
and
(Robert Francis Kennedy – 1968 campaign for the Democratic Nomination to the US Presidency, “There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why… I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?”)
***Reflecting upon my previous post “Monthly Quote To Ponder ..In Our Contemporary World”, I asked myself “Why monthly?) – not really challenging for me to write. Then I asked, “Why not a weekly quote to take with to ponder over the 7 day period?” – Giving myself more of a challenge and opportunity for self-improvement***
“The fault lies not in our stars, but within ourselves”
Possible answer to the question of, “Why do we continue to suffer with repeating failures?” – whether those failures be of a micro-personal or a macro-social nature.
Let’s not always look to the external for our shortcomings or failures we endure. Search within and change our way of thinking to find alternative paradigms for success.
(Considering Shakespeare – Julius Caesar, “Thefault, dear Brutus, is notinourstars, But in ourselves, that we are underlings.”)
While on a recent visit to my childhood home I reflected upon the years gone by and experienced an epiphany or a revelation of sorts. What I realized was that I had been living in fear. The fear was of the nature of my life and everything in it changing unrecognizably. Losing my childhood or the ideal of it consumed me essentially impacting nearly every aspect of my life along the way.
Growing up, home had been a constant for me. It seemed nothing ever really changed or if it did it wasn’t by much. My mother was always there for me – the nurturer, the cook, and to some degree my friend and counsellor. My father, though I never spent very much time with him, was somehow always around as well. My brothers and sisters had remained the same and even though they had children of their own, they too were rigid fixtures anchored in time. Each change of season and holiday was something I could set my proverbial watch by. Whether good or bad nothing ever really changed and my world was always safe and dependable. Unbeknownst to me, that would all change with the death of someone that was very important in my life.
I lost a close family friend, someone who had known me since the day I had been born. This man was our family minister and nothing less than a surrogate father to me. He basically guided me through life getting me over some very difficult hurdles. He was there for me when my father was not. I thoroughly enjoyed his counsel and so did countless numbers of others. In fact, he would receive visitors from miles away who would come just to hear his words and prophecies. He had a mystical quality about him and was nothing short of extraordinary. His loss shook me more than I could have imagined. I didn’t have the opportunity to say goodbye to him properly as I was out of the country during the time of his passing.
Several years later, I lost an older sister to a brain aneurysm. She was fairly young and as it occurred suddenly and unexpectedly, I never had the opportunity to say goodbye to her either. This would later become a pattern for me, not saying goodbye. Things in my world would remain fairly stable for a few years after that until I lost my brother to cancer in 2010 and a year ago, lost my father. I wasn’t home for either of their funerals as I had been living abroad and unable to get back in time. I think part of me in some way did not want to face the losses. I could not come to terms with the life changes they represented. Now with the opportunity to come home again, nothing is the same and my deepest fears have come to fruition. My mother and siblings are much older than I remembered. Nieces and nephews are either in college or working with lives of their own and all of them are virtually unrecognizable to me now. My childhood home and community also seemed to have drastically changed as has life itself. Nothing feels the same or is the same.
According to the Oxford Dictionary “fear” is defined as an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or is a threat. It is also a feeling of anxiety concerning the outcome of something or the safety and well-being of someone. All of the aforementioned is, in some way applicable. Fear of changes, of loss, of failures, of success and so on and so forth have plagued me since childhood. It has impacted me in some very critical ways well into my adulthood affecting my ambitions, goals, relationships, and views on life. I believe this is true of all of us to a certain extent.
It is my contention that we internalize certain fears that we have burying them so deeply that we consciously forget that they existed at all. It then becomes difficult for us to let go, give up or even in some respects to “move on”. I have stated in a recent post that the very nature of life itself is change. The fear of that change whether it is perceived or not can affect us in some unimaginable and profound ways. This fear can be quite debilitating and hinder who we are or who we are to become. It can destroy relationships and leave us both figuratively and literally alone. It also may impact our physical health as well as our happiness. A certain degree of anxiety or fear is healthy and to a degree necessary. Too much fear can leave us drowning not only in our past but lost in a world of “would-have, could-have or should-have-been”.
Personally, as I move forward, I understand that I have to deal with the fear and pain of loss. The realization that nothing is permanent in this world is the first step. Everything changes whether it is family, communities, countries, environments and especially oneself. At some point, everything also dies. It is a fact of life and is a necessity for rebirth. Fully understanding this can be transformative. I am not use to penning these types of personal posts but the epiphany compelled me to share this. I hope this revelation finds those of you who may be experiencing a similar life crisis.
I felt the need to update this post in these the most difficult of times. Wherever you are and whatever is taking place in your life you should always remember that you are never alone. We all share a common consciousness of ONE CREATION. IT will always be with us.
Fear may isolate and debilitate you but ultimately you have control – control of your own thoughts and your actions. In this you should find both comfort and strength to accept whatever may come over the horizon. Therefore, allow yourself to experience the emotion for a brief moment but then release it. Focus on that which binds us all together and then drive forward.
Where do we go from here? We are together both day and night in every quarter and in every season our union bonded inextricably by the Blacksmith
One who has invoked this phase of uncertainty has caused the infernal army of Hannibal to live and wage war with sharp and heated steal within
Through you he has imparted a curse and a blessing that i cannot as of yet fully comprehend
As we are initially thrust together, your presence is suffocating
I can neither breathe nor think, virtually immobilized by your sisters embrace
She ensures that hesitation and mistrust will be a constant companion upon leaving the Forge
In the two of you self-doubt is manifested a thousand fold and mirrors my reflection in every direction
But in chaos you endeavor to instruct my growth and development as I fight against you at every turn resisting all overtures
It is much too soon to give ear to your guidance much less understand it. For now, subsisting on the rawness of you is more than I can bear – nothing else exist or matters
Father promises that I will come to accept you and your wisdom but employing Patience is essential
His sanguine words falls upon deaf ears as it is a cost I am unwilling to incur but certainly one that cannot be avoided
But within the deep recesses of my psyche, I perceive another anvil lies waiting anxiously on the horizon and that your exasperating lectures must be endured if i am to survive the next encounter
For now, I ask once again, “Where do we go from here?”
Here in the darkness as Jupiter lies upon the foot of Ophiuchus I stare into the abyss of that which will be shortly upon us as a warning to the current generation. Assembled ten to speak that which is feared to be spoken. Oh misguided generation, you stand as misers, wrapped within your own lust and misguided in deeds and desires. You, who are crossed believing in sympathy, understanding and in your own practicality and honor as the way to salvation. A Judgement will be shortly upon you.
You have been reared in much prosperity and bliss resulting in your childish notions of a universal love and passion that cannot be as of yet. You see through the eyes of rose colored glasses which has no place in this time. For they present to you false hopes, images and deluded dreams. Through them only disappointment and death awaits.
There you stand as the Fool, enthusiastic, optimistic with only pleasure and frivolity as your companion. Imaging yourselves as one that is on a quest rushing headstrong into the fray to right wrongs of the past and plant the seeds of Utopia! However, this gallant achievement may not be realized without understanding, true pain and suffering. Yes, you see yourselves as the brave and honorable knight; the hero or heroine with great skill and might. But you impetuously charge into the unknown without fear and the wisdom of the wise. A great Crisis awaits you, one that has not been known before. A Calamity that will rock you and the rest of the world to its very foundations. Unbelievable pain, anguish, sickness, persecution and turmoil will you find children.
Humble yourselves in its wake. You must find the internal strength to not only over come the external challenges that lay waste to your world but the internal demons that have cultivated ignorance and arrogance within you. Look to the elders, the wise Hierophant, for wisdom and to the generation that follow for inspiration. That which lies shortly ahead could possibly destroy all that is, has been and could ever be. It has been rooted in the vanity of your ancestors and cultivated in greed, arrogance, ignorance, lust and selfishness. But do not forsake hope, knowledge of the past, understanding of what is and wisdom for what could be. In this there will be your greatest chance to create something new and exceptionally good, beautiful and ever-lasting. That which has not been seen for ages.
Now the eye begins to close and rest must be obtained for the Oracle.
I would own the greatest castle if I were not so simple of a man
I would wear the most expensive mode if I were not so disgusted by the envy of others
I would immerse myself in the wonderment of my Mother’s nature if others had not defiled it so
I would accumulate treasure and wealth beyond measure if it were not so corrupted by the souls of the foolish
I would navigate all the tranquil seas of this world if they had not been so polluted by ignorance
I would be enslaved by Aphrodite’s passion if it had not been reduced to vanity and trinkets of illusion by Madmen
I would save Nation and World from its insecure, parochial, vindictive, paranoid un-enlightenment consuming conscience and soul in its journey into the abyss if it were not for the fact that I simply don’t care
For what purpose then beautiful and enigmatic Creation, is it to desire, to live and then to perish?
In Athena’s name I beseech thee for Solomonic wisdom!
I invoke Descartes’ pondering, “I Think Therefore I AM” but what meaning holds this in elucidation in purity and truth of a living death where to live evokes no passion or purpose?
Am I ugly for feeling, or for not feeling?
And…if I may ask, or you ugly like me so that I am not alone?
loss. The realization that nothing is permanent in this world is the first step. Everything changes whether it is family, communities, countries, environments and especially oneself. At some point, everything also dies. It is a fact of life and is a necessity for rebirth. Fully understanding this can be transformative. I am not use to penning these types of personal posts but the epiphany compelled me to share this. I hope this revelation finds those of you who may be experiencing a similar life crisis.
certainly one that cannot be avoided
